First

 

At this moment, looking back to every little thing that I experienced, it was a tough first quarter. It is a restarting moment, from introducing yourself to your new handlers and again, to a new environment. Maybe there was still a bit of hesitation and "how" questions making myself not so very open inside the classroom/school, but little by little things are getting more lighter. It was not easy, it was a slow but fast moment, it was a moment of adjusting everything. Though, I still managed to be steady with the tough start.

My thoughts were "how will I make myself proud this time?" "how will I make myself steady this time?". My first quarter went well, I enjoyed and had fun doing new things again. The subjects were interesting in my part, specifically those activities given by our teachers. Sometimes we are scientists, sometimes electricians, reporters, and many more. With these moments, I realized that I can be a person with so much passion and not just a student who wants to learn. I wanted myself to slow down and take my academics not so so so serious to the point that I will drain myself. I wanted to avoid the things that made me weak when I was in Boyle, I wanted to slowly change my toxic habits because I want to enjoy my stay in Maxwell. As a person who set her eyes only to the things that helps me, I guess changing some things about myself is not a bad thing at all. There was still that self pressure, which I badly want to avoid but I can't. The pressure from my own self is my biggest challenge, every time. I always remind myself to take things slowly but the pressure slides through like air which makes me hate my own thoughts (sometimes).

Moving on, I will continue to explore and not be afraid to risk a thing (school purposes). I was disappointed by some things but then it doesn't make my first quarter really that negative. Also, a pat on my shoulder for trying and not letting things get all in which makes the brain and heart ache. I also want to remind myself that the things you want will not go in your way alone, you need try and try and try with a mix of your hard work and passion. Bitter or sweet, steady or shaky, trying will not make you less.

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